On Legacy (Part 2)

What of those who dreamed of leaving a tangible, material legacy, the kind I wrote of a few days ago, but circumstance conspired to rob them of that opportunity?

Splodge read my post about my tangible musical legacy and was sad for the art she never got to leave behind. My mate, Jeff, feels the world left him behind, too. This is more common than my bourgeois privilege of leaving a record for posterity, way more common. Probably much closer to the universal experience than mine.

So, what is the legacy of the person in the street? What can those behind the eight ball claim as their contribution to posterity?

A life lived, setbacks endured? Our friends witnessed it, our lovers touched it, our families bore it with us. Late mother-in-law dismissed hers, "Don't blow my Trumpet!" she chided Linda, but Linda is having none of that, nor I! We loved her, we marvelled at her talent as a watercolourist, as a career woman, as carer for her late partner. Mother-in-Law, Raewyn, built a family and a home, raised a daughter I am privileged to have met and, even moreso, privileged to share a life with. If Linda ended tomorrow, she would endure in my heart, forever leaving a bigger legacy in me than any music I have left. Raewyn, in her friendship and wise words, has left a legacy in me and, probably similar in all who knew her.

Same for alt-partner Splodge, and for my friend, "Jeffrey." He's just Jeff, but I call him that because he meets every day with good nature and a commitment to friends and family. It feels right to give him this dignity of a more formal voicing. Like Splodge, Jeff lives with things which make life a little harder than it has been for me. This makes his good nature a legacy that will live on in all who knew him and called him friend, brother or, as I do, brother by another mother.

Splodge's legacy seems to me to be the alt aunty to her nephews. A mum and dad have to mainstream the raising of their kids, set standards, encourage goals, teach ethics and cut lunches. An aunty gets to teach the fun stuff. Act up, tell a cheeky joke, break the rules... especially being the youngest of four. And she has modelled how to deal with the not so fun stuff, too. May it never happen to nieces and nephews. Setback, loss, unattainable dreams, if you know me here, it's through her and you have read her tellings firsthand. Raewyn was that kind of role model for her niece and great niece. I am sure Alison's family will remember her in ways not dissimilar to how Raewyn is remembered. Certainly with fondness and in longing for less mortal times

These are the real legacies to hope for. Art is fleeting and of its time. Love is timeless for as long as it is held in memory, and sometimes in keepsakes inherited by those beyond remembering because they're too young or not yet born.

Will Crunchysteve be remembered for this? I am a bit crunchy, afterall. Without arrogance, I know I will, because, like Raewyn, I have family who love me without measure, friends who trust me, a wife who has supported my choices as I have supported hers.

A decent person, loved and remembered by family and friends. That is a legacy to have in state. That's the most valuable legacy of all. In my case, 3 wise, feisty, strong-willed daughters will remember me with love and laughter, for all my flaws. Their children probably, too. Linda, Splodge and Jeff. My sister, my passing parade of friends. It is the memories we give our nearest and dearest that are our greatest of all legacies.